my murphy’s timeline

This was my day. We enjoyed a week-long (or was it ten days?) trip to my in-laws in Memphis and returned tonight.  It was totally cuckoo, and by the end, well, you can see for yourself.

1:00 a.m. Go to sleep

4:00 a.m. Baby wakes up screaming.  Continues for about two hours or so, intermittently being picked up by me and cuddled/put back into the crib.  No baby tylenol around to soothe.  We try with the diaper change and the bottle, unsuccessfully.

6:15 a.m. Finally falls asleep partially on top of me.  Would be yummy if not for extreme sleep deprivation

7:22 a.m. Husband’s cell phone alarm goes off.  He is not in the room to shut it off.  He is on the other side of the house.

7:27 a.m. Baby wakes up from alarm.  Fortunately for everyone, baby remains docile.

8:30 a.m. Husband enters room.  Realizes alarm has been going off for an hour.  Apologizes profusely.  Is forgiven.  Takes baby and tells me to go back to sleep.  I decide (again) that I made a good choice in marrying this man.

9:10 a.m. Husband enters again and gently urges me to start getting ready.

9:15 a.m. Flurry of activity including: showering; packing; cleaning up after ourselves; eating; feeding/strolling the baby; visiting with an old friend who stopped by to shmooze.  Happily, baby naps for about an hour.

12:30 p.m. Leave for airport.  Baby is a little kvetchy on the way.  I begin to feel nervous.

12:45 p.m. Arrive at airport.  Husband realizes that his i.d is in his mother’s car.  Thankfully, I had insisted that she remain in case our suitcases were over the weight limit (they were not).  Otherwise, she would have driven back to work (30 minutes away), and was without her cell phone and we would have missed our flight.  Score one for my paranoia and aversion to ridiculous fees.

1:15 p.m. Husband retrieves i.d. from mother, hugs all around and we head through security.

1:40 p.m. Am patted down because I cannot take off my jacket (which was really not all that jacket-like, in my opinion) due to the fact that I was wearing a sleeveless shell.  Annoyed that my modest apparel apparently makes me a profiled dangerous person.  Would be more grateful for the security if the people weren’t rude about it.  Blah.  Realize that I have been patted down every time I have been in an airport for the past two years.  Make resolution to wear more airport-security-friendly apparel in the future.  Not sure if it’s possible as an Orthodox Jew who is (hopefully) regularly pregnant.

2:15 p.m. the flight.  Baby is only cranky a little bit at the beginning, but after much back-patting and some carefully administered Tylenol, he is excellent throughout the flight.  Someone even tells us “good job” at the end of the flight.

5:45 (or something) p.m. Plane lands, we wait until the end, find the restrooms, find out luggage, find our ride

7:00 p.m. arrive home, eat a little something the my mother-in-law (love her!) packed us.

7:35 p.m Husband goes to minyan

8:35 p.m.Husband calls the butcher to pick up meat order, but butcher doesn’t answer.  Husband stops by, butcher is under the weather, says meat is at store and will send son over

9:20 pm.still no word, so went to pick up milk from friend’s house, but was late, and friend wasn’t there.  Call from front porch, no answer.  lm.  Called mom on cell to complain.

9:30 p.m. cell phone dies, go back home to charge it.  Still no word from butcher.

9:45 p.m. line fridge shelves myself ’cause impatient for husband to do it (he would have done it).  Call mom to complain.  Hub calls butcher, and butcher says “maybe 10:30.”

10:00 p.m. drive to kosher grocer (usually open ’til 11 on Thursdays).  Closed at 6 today.

10:15 p.m. call mom to complain.  Drive to nearby grocery store.  They closed at 10. Call husband to ask advice (still needed to go to grocery store 20 min away, wasn’t sure if I should wait for butcher and unpack or just go to store).  He says go to store.

10:30 p.m. drive to grocery store which is open 24 hours (love them!!!!!). Call mom on the way. Wait at light for green arrow, wait another cycle, wonder if green arrow is still applicable this time of night.  It is.  Pull into parking space, see the cart someone had left  there.  Nudge it rebelliously with bumper, then appropriate it for my shopping needs.

10:45 p.m. cell phone dies.  Again.  Mutter about the low-life battery.

11:20 p.m. spend obscene amount of money, despite still not having everything I need.

11:45 p.m. come home, write all of this down.

12:10 a.m. format text.

12:20 a.m. give up on formatting text and post entry.

12:25 a.m. go to sleep.

It got kind of loopy toward the end, but I think all the craziness was worth the fact that our baby behaved well on the plane ride.  Seems an even trade-off to me.  Also, the butcher’s son brought the meat right to our house.  Yay!


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