guest post

Guest Post: Necessity is the Mother

Much thanks to today’s guest poster, Joan Oliver Emmer, who blogs about her life as a Trophy Wife at Body of Work.

I was pleased to figure out a way to avoid the trauma of stepping on the scale at the doctor’s office the other day.  While I’m not TERRIBLY unhappy with my weight, it’s not at the level I had planned at this point in the season or in life (in fact, it’s a whole lot MORE than I had planned). So, instead of watching the nurse/technician move that little metal thingy over a notch to the right…and another…oh, two more? Hey – have they run out of notches?  –  this is what I did:

  • I closed my eyes and told the tech to keep her trap shut (in the nicest way possible, of course).

She busied herself jotting down a number…wait, that took a while!  Did she add a fourth number, like, in the thousands place?

Bottom line was, she didn’t faint, I was none the wiser – life is good!

Sometimes you just have to figure it out.  Here are other things I’ve “figured out” recently.

  • If you sit on your glasses and bend them out of shape and subsequently walk with your head cocked at a 45 degree angle, you can avoid a visit to the optometrist.

  • Oiling a hamster wheel with WD-40 will silence both the wheel – and the hamster – much quicker and more permanently than using regular cooking oil.
  • You can live a whole two years with an oven door that does not close – all you need to do is prop one of your kitchen table chairs against the recalcitrant (I believe it’s a mitzvah to sneak the word “recalcitrant” into a post every year) oven door .  That way you have an excuse for not inviting your mother-in-law over for dinner, citing “lack of  sufficient chairs.” She doesn’t want to sit on the floor, does she?

How do YOU “make do” in a pinch?

2 thoughts on “Guest Post: Necessity is the Mother

  1. Adorable. Recalcitrant a mitzvah, eh? I have teenagers. I have reason to have used up my quotient for a good five years already.

    Had I known that oiling hamsters was yet another use for that miracle tool, WD-40, I might not have said no to the boys so quickly about rodent pets. (Who would have blamed me if they dropped off the wheel during routine maintenance?)

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