Motherhood

When There’s No Family In Town

A good year!  I hope everyone who was observing Yom Kippur experienced a good day of fasting and prayer, in whatever form it took (i.e. at home with the kids, in a new shul, more/less kavannah than last year).  May this upcoming year be a year of connection, of happiness, of growth, love and redemption.  Bam.

Remember the post by Miriam Hendeles a few weeks back?  The one about inter-generational relationships?  Well, I’ve reciprocated over at her blog.  She’s a bubby and a mother-in-law, and I’m a mommy and a daughter-in-law, and the post at the natural intersection of that is staying in touch in these roles.  Well, there’s where my brain went.

It’s unfortunately (in my opinion) common to live far from family.  Used to be that most people lived in the same city.  Really, it used to be that everyone lived in the same HOUSE, and while that happens now, in various incarnations (having a parent move in with you, or temporarily staying with parents while you regroup), I don’t think it’s as prevalent for a young couple to move in with mom and dad and just stay.  Tell me if I’m wrong.

We are among those who do not live near family (and I’m talking at least a 14-hour drive away), and I do wish that weren’t the case.  But the chances of my parents moving to us are slim (my father maintains that he will only move to a warmer climate, and while Baltimore isn’t exactly chilly, it’s comparable to where they live.  So no luck there), and although I haven’t given up on the idea that my mother-in-law will come here, there are no clear signs that it will happen.

Even though there are different challenges when family is in town (I’m sure everyone who actually DOES has family in town is vigorously nodding their heads), for me, the benefit of being able to develop a close relationship with grandparents outweighs any challenges that arise.

having fun at Bubby's!
having fun at Bubby’s!

Anyways, my post over at Miriam’s isn’t me blathering on and on about how nice it would be to have grandparents in town, but about how my husband and I try to develop and maintain the relationship between our kids and our parents, despite the distance.  I would love to hear about how you do it, if you also have distance between you and your family.  See you over there!

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